March Goals

Alright, as I mentioned last week my life is a bit all over the place. I'm hoping that bringing back my monthly goals keeps me focused, more productive and less stressed.

Work out 3x week

Like I mentioned, in the midst of everything else the gym has been falling to the bottom of my list for the past few months. I'm really starting to feel it mentally and physically. I'd absolutely LOVE to get it incorporated to my everyday routine, but I'm going to start with baby steps. Following Bethanny Frankel's "do what you can" model.

Finish a book

I started  Sloan Crosley's The Clasp over the Christmas break. I got through almost all of it, but the last 50 pages have been hanging over my head for 2 months now. Time to wrap. it. up. and move on.

Find healthier snacks

I'm starting to accept that I will never by a 3 meal a day person. I've tried the the small meals 5 times a day thing, but it just requires too much cooking and time. I usually eat breakfast around 9 or 10 and then lunch around 12/1....not matter what I'm always hungry around 3pm. Because it's somewhat the middle of the day, I have to grab something small and quick. Between something laying around the office or running quickly to The Corner Bakery downstairs, I always go with carb heavy (usually sugar heavy) snacks. I'm going to start bringing more healthy items to work to be prepared for the afternoon crash. Fruit, jerky, hummus and veggies maybe? What are your go-to healthy snacks?

Start a better savings plan

For the 2nd year in a row, I did my taxes all by myself and finished them up last week. I will NOT be writing a 'how-to' or 'tips' post, because I'm pretty sure I took the longest way possible and I did not enjoy it. You should definitely try it though (especially if your single, not a homeowner, didn't make any BIG financial changes this year), it's very empowering.  Anyway, my tax refunds always go directly to savings, which I'm trying to build back up after my move and brief stint as a #ladyofleisure. The Everygirl blog (currently obsessed with) did a 30 day challenge last month and I'm going to take it on in March. I want to build up the emergency fund, start long term 'want' savings plan and figure out what the heck to do with my 401k's,

Keep track of my life more

Things have been going SO FAST lately. I really need to step back every so often, look at the big picture and reflect. I'm aiming to do this here which will also encourage me to blog more (woo!).

All. the. things.

I've been more than a little all over the place lately (mentally and physically)! I continued my jet setting adventures Presidents' Day weekend and headed back to LA. We actually took a mini-roadtrip up to Santa Barbara for a few days and it was absolutely divine. 80 and sunny was much needed after 20 and grey for so long! It's looking like that will be my last trip for a month or so (thankfully?). Travel is just so stressful in general and when your in a LDR your time is so valuable it adds an extra pressure to it. After being apart for the usual 2 weeks again I was so excited to see him again. I lost it at the mere thought of missing my connection in Minneapolis and having to spend 6 hours in the middle of no where. That's precious time I could have spent with the BF.....or even doing work or catching up on the rest of my life. That is all in addition to the stress of being stuck in an airport, rearranging flights to get either to him or home and dealing with the monster that is humanity in an airport. Stakes are high. He's agreed to travel these next few times and has Spring Break coming up so that should be helpful and less stressful for both of us.

Meanwhile, work has been in.sane. You may have even seen some of our handy work in the Superbowl! I really love what I do and it's hard to believe I've only been here 3 months. There is so much chaos that needs to be ordered, its hard to figure out where to start. Like I said, I'm super excited about it, time (see paragraph above) is just becoming a huge factor and that's extra stressful. 

When I have had time for me it's usually spent on catching up on the Bachelor, I should really figure out how to combine this with the gym (something else that continues to fall to the bottom of the list after all of the above). I actually started a watching group for this season. It seemed like a great way to meet new, like minded friends in the city. It's been so great, but I've been missing a lot due to travel and work....I'm starting to feel like the worst hostess. There are only 3 episodes left though and I will for sure make 2 of them!! I've been find Ben a bit boring this season. He seems like a nice guy, but maybe too nice. Also, I started watching Unreal last year and now I question everything that happens on that show/feel horrible for the girls. I'm so pumped to see who wins. I was originally Team Becca, but {I'm sorry girl} I can never tell what kind of emotion she actually expressing. As much as I try I can't quite connect with her emotionally....I think Ben hit that road block too. 

The BF was here this weekend and the trip definitely hit the inevitable roadbumps (aka flight cancellations), but the weather was absolutely gorgeous and he made it here just before the temperature dropped again. We went to go see Deadpool {ladies, it's hilarious...and also Ryan Reynolds full frontal. I promise you'll enjoy!} on Sunday and then last night I took him to see one of my favorite singers, Stephen Kellogg. I hadn't seen him in forever, but it was just as I remembered. It was so great to be able to share that with BF too. Definitely a great way to start of the week, despite having to say goodbye this morning. Hoping those positive vibes carry me through the next 10 days. 

Thanks for listening, xoxo.

Lots of Life News {not mine}

This last week was full of lots of exciting news for my favorite people!

Last weekend one of my favorite ladies, Allison Williams, tied the knot with her long-time {and equally hilarious} beau, Ricky Van Veen. She chose an absolutely stunning Oscar De La Renta dress complete with the ever elegant illusion neckline, deep v back and bow. The couple added a little whimsy to their classic affair by having Tom Hanks officiate!

The other very exciting news was for power-woman Ivanka Trump, who announced just yesterday they're adding a third child to their family come February. She had the cutest facebook video!




This weekend I'm off to Milwaukee to a dear college friend's Baby Shower. She's the first one of the crew to be reproducing. Its so special to be able to share the shower with everyone and be back in the midwest!

Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

The last 3 weeks have been quite a whirlwind. In the end of July, my company decided to start moving operations to Canada and my role was one of those eliminated in move. After a week of some soul searching and math, I realized that the only jobs I was looking at were in Chicago and my severance would go twice as far there too. I made the decision on August 1st that after 6.5 years in San Francisco it was time to make the transition.

Then I was thrown into the chaos of arranging, facilitating and prepping for a cross country move! On top of it it was equally as rough wrapping up not only a huge chapter of my life, but the first one that I created entirely on my own. There were long days, minimal sleeping and a lot of life purging (I threw away 50 nail polishes....that 50x$8 = $450 worth of nail polish where did I even get that!?), but I'm finally in Chicago and getting my life (back?) in order. I'm pretty excited for this new adventure!!

Draper James

I could not be more excited for the launch of one of my favorite lady's lifestyle website!!
Ms. Witherspoon launched Draper James earlier this month and I'm coveting everything. I can't wait to see the blog posts, I'm already planning a spring luncheon of my own.




The site has everything from skirts to stationery, but these items are at the top of me list!

Cocktail Napkins

Magnolia Cocktail Ring

Vanderbilt Tote

A Note on Love and Other Struggles

I started this post a week or so ago with the thought of referencing this Thought Catalog entry about the difference between a husband and a boyfriend. The death of Robin Williams, an actor and comedian that had such an impact on my childhood and life, has only put it in deeper perspective and motivated me to finish it up.

I mentioned in my end of year post that 2013 was the year of LOVE. I felt a lot of of love from my friends and got a whole new perspective on what it really means to love people. I don't know if it was fairy tales or the way I grew up, but I've always viewed love as somewhat of a selfish act. Saying someone/something is so important to you and your life that I guess one almost looses themselves in the person they 'love'. Almost as if the person you 'loved' belonged to you (and vice versus) and if you found a person who agreed to belong to you that was 'true love'.  With that view this 'love' everyone talked about was exhausting, self consuming and often left me feeling really alone and confused when I was trying to figure out how you can love someone who 'hurts' you. Feelings wise I mean, it left me really angry and defensive. I'm not just talking about relationships either, friendships were in this category. Long story short, if you weren't my best friend you were dirt to me. If you weren't 110% with me, on the same page, you were against me.

There was a point this spring, literally overnight, where this view changed for me. I had one of those "if they loved me how could they even think about doing this to me!" moments that you see in movies. As much as I wanted to push this into the 'dirt' category, there was just something about that couldn't. That would mean that every beautiful, happy, loving moment was dirt and I knew, in my soul, that that wasn't the case. It wasn't black, it wasn't white and bottom line it wasn't about ME. It was about this person. This person that I loved, this person that I knew, at the very least cared about me on some level. So how can a person who cares do something hurtful?  It's not because they hate you, its not because they're not your friend, its because they don't know how to process, like myself at times and like so many humans. In that moment I was filled with so much care and love and concern, but at the same time understood that I didn't have the mental or emotional capacity to put myself through that treatment. Thats when I realized what it meant to love. To understand and respect the struggle of being a human, but to be able to respect your own boundaries. To keep your heart open, but protect yourself.
I was so incredibly surprised when I was so filled with this new love and I just had to get it out, that through shaking and tears face one of my deepest fears and came out 'okay'. A few months prior, had I done what I did I would have 100% regretted it. I sat there, looking at my therapist, and was so weirded out how 'okay' I felt. I was fine. She just looked at me and said "when you do something out of love you don't regret, no matter the outcome."

I think the last paragraph in that Thought Catalog post sums it up:

The Guy You Marry: The guy you have fun with, but also cry with, laugh with, fight with, love with, and will be with for the rest of your life. You have feelings for him, but you are not with him solely because of your emotions. You are with him because you will love him apart from how tired, depressed, or angry you feel. He understands that loving you denotes sacrificing his time, energy, and other aspirations, and is still more than willing to make the commitment. He loves you not with a selfish or envious love, but with a patient, enduring, humble, faithful and selfless one. 

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. It does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.” -1 Corinthians 13:4-7

I've been wanting a white tattoo for a few years now and in this moment I knew what I wanted to do. I wanted an everyday reminded to keep my heart open, to do all things in 'Love'. 1 Corinthians has been a running theme in my life and I knew I just had to do the simple, white, open heart.

                                     

Not to say that Robin Williams wasn't loved, or did hurtful things, but it just strikes the chord of that, everyone is fighting their own battle. Their dealing with their own demons and struggles and actions are based on that. The ones that hurt the most often need the most love.  So keep your heart open. Keep loving. "There are a lot of amazing people out there to be grateful for. Thats what life is about"


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Quality > Quantity

I hope everyone had an absolutely amazing weekend! San Francisco 'summer' has officially arrived and it was gorgeous!

This weekend was full of a lot of changes and letting go for me; between redecorating our living room, adjusting to new roommates and (gulp) cutting the cord with that 1 guy you always go back to it was a difficult, but productive weekend. Change is always scary and, especially, immediately after making changes I always find myself second guessing my decisions. A friend of mine shared this blog post on facebook this morning and I couldn't find it more relevant and absolutely true. The thing that almost scares me more than change is empty space and sometimes you have to face that fear and just let it be.

Boys, furniture, friends, food this is applicable to everything.

How to make space for quality to show up in your life.

What does bad home decor have to do with reaching your full potential? Thought you’d never ask.
Imagine an ugly chair — in your own living room. And in walks an angelic and hip interior designer who’s on a mission to help you create fresh, contemporary comfort in your space. And she says, “What’s with that damn ugly chair?” And you say, “I know it’s horrible, I hate it. But I haven’t had the money to get a new one.” Cosmic designer then orders you to get rid of ugly chair that very weekend. Pronto. And you protest, “But what will we sit on?”
Angel of design dictates, “Sit on the floor. Pile up on the couch. You’ll figure it out. The sooner you get rid of it, the sooner the right chair will show up.”
You resist, “But they’ll be a…big…hole in the room.”
Designer of flow says, “Yep! It’s called space! Every time you walk by that space, you’ll be thinking about how great a new chair is going to feel.”
You keep resisting, “But shouldn’t I order the ideal chair first, before I get rid of the old one? Have the new one delivered, then have the old one taken away?”
“Actually, it’s better of you don’t. Let the space be there. It’ll change the way you look at the whole room. And besides, maybe a chair isn’t what’s best. You won’t know until you let go…of the chair.”
The light dawns. You pipe up, “You know, I really can’t wait to get rid of that freakin’ chair.” Nodding. Grins. “I’ll call the Goodwill pick up guys.” Action!It’s a beautiful sight when right that very instant you shove that chair into the garage for it’s re-using destiny.
Letting go makes way for something closer to your truth…which is always more beautiful. Always.
Making space signals the universe that you’re ready for ideal…or at the very least, much improved.
Making space expands your being and clarifies (and dare I say, actually minimizes) your needs.
The Divine Law of the Ugly Chair applies as much to furniture and stuff, as it does to lovers, careers, and thought forms.
Because: Going without, and holding out, is better than selling out.Always.
Let’s milk the chair metaphor a bit longer. You’ve got the nasty chair (or…boss, or incessant critical thought, or crappy winter coat,) in your space. Every time you come across it in your physical or psychic area, you consciously or subtly think, “Meh, that damn… boss guy…self-criticism…crappy winter coat.” And you affirm to yourself that it’s okay to put up with fugly, or nasty, or uncomfortable.
You make “making do” your normal. You’re giving up precious space to something that isn’t precious to you.Things you don’t use. People who use you. Possessions-roles-gigs that make you feel pinched, or awkward, cheated, compromised, heavy, confused…stuffed — they need to go. You know this. But it’s not just because dumping the chump and reducing your carbon footprint is a rightful, socially responsible and life-affirming action. It’s because possibility requires space to unfold.Clear space.Expand possibility.Everywhere.

At the Lake...

I hope everyone had a great Labor Day Weekend! I had an amazingly perfect one!

I spent Labor Day weekend at my family's lake house. I usually go for a week or 2 around the 4th of July, but because of my European adventure I wasn't able to make it. Fiscally responsible me was thinking that I wasn't going to be able to make it at all this summer, but as the last, unofficial, weekend of summer approached my heartstrings got the best of me.

It's about 2 hours northeast of the Minneapolis in the small town of Wascott, Wisconsin. Both my Grandparents grew up 10 minutes north of Wascott in Gordon and after leaving to pursue careers and raise family, returned to live in their retirement. My Grandpa has 3 brothers and they all bought houses on the same lake. Those houses have been full of summer memories for 3 generations now and I quite honestly couldn't turn away a summer without it.

The sound of the water, the birds, the dogs and the thumping of kids feet down the wooden docks followed by a huge splash; the smell of nature mixed with a little boat gasoline; the feel of sandy grass in your toes those have been the only constants in a life full of changes (I've lived in 6 different states and 15 different houses in my 25 years). There's about a foot high step between the living room and the dining room and I can remember being so little I had to sit down to get down it by myself, without falling. There's no where else in the world I have those kinds of memories. That's a kind of comfort and relaxation that I can't get anywhere else. I would say I am truly at peace. It was quiet, but welcome refreshment in a very stressful work environment and allowed me to put a lot of things in perspective that I've been struggling with for a while now.

I can't believe I was there just a week ago. Besides the 3 mosquito bites on my legs and pictures; it feels so far away. T-9 months until next summer!

A Friday Favorite

About a month ago a friend told me about The Conversation; a show coming to Lifetime featuring one-on-one interviews with successful women (some celebrities, others not). I had seen a couple previews, but didn't think much of it.

Well, I just happened upon the 3rd(?) episode featuring Miley Cyrus, Diane Von Furstenburg, Glenda Bailey and Megan McCarthy and I absolutely love it. Very enlightening, very real. It's a lot of the same things you hear from most people trying to give you advice, but when they're thrown in with personal anecdotes they really make you feel like you're sitting there chatting it up with DVF!

You can watch last night's episode on their website, which also has a lot of interesting blog posts and clips on life advice from all sorts of women.